Quite Being Judgemental, Judgey

Is anyone still up with me? I’ve been sick all week, and still am having a hard time not feeling 100% yet.  That makes it very difficult for me to actually fall asleep.  Even after two Melatonin, I toss and turn trying not to cough up a lung.  So here I sit, on my website, for the millionth time trying to get it perfect.  The problem with “perfect” for an artist is that there is no perfect.  Only perfectionism that seems to take control of our lives in the most untimely moments.  I have been working on this site now for the past two weeks to get it looking “perfect”.  Yet, I just can’t seem to make all of the pieces fit together just the way I want them too.  But I am contemplating of letting the stress of perfectionist dictate to me how perfect I should be.  I know that we all do it.  We put unreasonable goals in front of us that just make us fret over why we didn’t accomplish them.

I have a friend of mine who I absolutely look up to.  You can check out here site at: here.  She’s smart, funny, extremely open, and writes like a comic champ.  She also is so successful on her blog that she gets companies to send her free things so that she can do a write up on their products.  Plus she has a million followers (well, that’s not true, but she has A LOT).  Honestly, I have a little bit of blog envy.  And that perfection starts to come out, and a little bit of my competitive nature.  I wonder to myself as I try to fall asleep at night, ‘I wonder how many hits I have now? Should I go check?’.  It’s all a little maniacal.  Just by looking at Katie below you get a pretty good idea who she is; fresh, inspiring, courageous and self-admittedly a little judgemental.  Which is what makes her real.  How often do you find a friend like that? So I guess I shouldn’t want her dead then.  That would be wrong just because I’m a selfish, envious and self-judging, and also very judgemental woman.  I will let her live along with her fantastic blog site.  I mean, it’s amazing and you need to check it out.  Then like my posts.  Then follow me too.

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Katie the cutie camera (R), Your truly camera (L)

Disclaimer: By the way, this blog from time to time is going to divert away from photography.  Especially, when I have insomnia.  It takes me forever to write it because of the Melatonin, and often I’ll sit in silence for a few minutes trying to remember what I was going to say.  You could say that I’m a bit of….there it goes again.  Off like a unicorn farting to the stars.

With all of that said, I’m going to bid you au revoir (that’s French you know) 😛 and try again to get some zzz’s.  Night to anyone who has taken the time to read this long piece.  I have no idea what it’s about myself.  Good on you for making the effort!

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A Trip Down Memory Lane

Recently, I broke down and finally bought a new camera.  I had been searching and thinking about it for over a year.  When I heard mirrorless cameras were the new “it” technology”, I figured I’d give it some time to see how it upholds on shoots and go from there.  One day I did a google search for the best travel cameras.  Upon our decision to go abroad again, I wanted to make sure that the camera I took with wasn’t a point-and-shoot with limited zoom range, or a big heavy professional camera that would give me a neck pain as well as a hunched back.  Then, as I was researching, a ghost of sorts came up from the mists and caught my eye.  The Fuji X T-10.  It took me by surprise because it was the exact one that I talk about in this blog about how I learned to shoot on my dad’s camera. I did research on the camera, and was impressed.  I even went down to Best Buy to take a look at it up close, and feel in love with it.  The features while impressive, was not the reason why I bought the camera, but to honor the legacy of my father.  I can’t tell you how happy and proud I am to own this camera.  Not out of vanity, or materialism, but because I feel that every time I go out on a shoot now, my dad is with me.  And that’s a pretty amazing feeling.

 

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My Dad’s 1980 Fujica camera right, and my Fujifilm X-T10 camera left.
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As you can see, Fujifilm revamped the retro style almost to a “T” minus the analog features.
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The back of the cameras side by side.
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I’m obsessed with this photo.  It’s the first one I took with my dad’s camera.  I know it’s a horrible photo.  But to me I think it’s the best one I’ve ever taken.